God's Love

3 Reasons God Doesn’t Always Answer Prayers for Protection

3. God wants to show that he still moves through our prayers.
I know, this may seem contradictory, right? But if we were never allowed to walk through valleys in this life, we would never need to call on God to deliver us. The valleys of life cause us to seek God in prayer, to rally the saints around us, and to wait for God to move. And he does. It just isn’t always on our timeline.In the gospel of John, Jesus and his disciples encountered a blind man. The disciples immediately assumed the man’s affliction was the result of sin — either the blind man’s or his parents. They asked Jesus who sinned, but Jesus gave them a response they weren’t expecting.“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him.” (John 9:3)If this man had been protected from blindness, Jesus wouldn’t have had the opportunity to heal him. And because of this healing, others were able to see his power at work and put their hope and trust in him.Many times, we don’t see the ways our stories overlap into the lives of others. But our stories are never just about us. God wants to use our stories as a living testimony of his goodness and grace, and to use them to draw others into his presence. When we aren’t allowed to walk through some difficult seasons, his opportunities to do this become limited because we still live in a fallen world. Humanity isn’t perfect, and when they see perfection in our own lives, it can actually be a deterrent rather than something that draws them closer.However, when they see followers of Christ walking through troubles just like they are, our stories become invitations. They might see our peace in the midst of chaos or the way God is carrying us through it, and want to know more. A unique opening for God’s love to reach someone is created because of something we wanted to skip over.Are you walking through a dark valley right now, and wondering why God didn’t protect you from it? Or perhaps, like me, you’re watching a loved one walk through it, wishing they didn’t have to. It is human to ask questions and to experience moments of frustration. But don’t let the enemy keep you there. Allow your point of weakness to be a propellant toward the Lord’s strength. He is not finished with your story, and this season is not a result of his anger or negligence toward you.He will use this chapter as a bridge into something greater, something you can’t quite see yet. Keep putting one foot in front of the other, and keep seeking his hand in the middle of your situation. One day you will look back and see evidence of his fingerprints all over it.Photo Credit: © Unsplash […]

God's Love

Praying Psalm 23: The Lord Is My Shepherd

Psalm 23 is one of the best known and most quoted chapters of the Bible. Its verses express David’s understanding of God’s care from his own personal experience. By praying its words, we can draw closer to who David knew God to be, and learn more intimately the ways God watches over us.David was a King, author, poet, warrior, devoted to God, and ancestor of Jesus Christ, Son of God. A descendent of shepherds who as a boy killed a lion and a bear with his own hands while protecting his sheep (1 Samuel 17:34-36). God described David as, “A man after my own heart” (Acts 13:22).Scripture often compares us to sheep, animals who are easily led astray. Like them, we wander and get into trouble. Helpless on their own, sheep need someone to care, feed, protect, and shelter them. When one wanders off, it’s likely to be taken by a predator. A good shepherd keeps each one in sight and meets their needs.“A Psalm of David. The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness for His name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You have anointed my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.” (Psalm 23)“The LORD is my Shepherd.”The LORD God Almighty, Creator of all that exists is our Shepherd. He is my Shepherd. People may mentor, teach, guide, or fight for us, but our one true Shepherd is God. No one else can fill that role. Only God can always be with us and see what is ahead. He alone knows what’s in our hearts and what our true needs are. He is perfect. If we look to a person as our caretaker, they will disappoint us. But we can trust God, He never fails.Lord God,Thank You for being my Shepherd. You keep Your eyes on me. You know everything about me and still love me. I’m never out of Your care. You are my strength and shield, the perfect Shepherd who never makes a mistake. You never forget me or leave me behind. I trust in Your perfect love and know You will never lead me astray.In Jesus’ Name,AmenPhoto Credit: © Getty Images/andreacerri
“I lack nothing.”In our consumer society, it seems we’re never satisfied. We frequently want more. How often does someone say, “I have all I need?” David expressed fulfillment saying, “I shall not want.” He trusted God to give him what he needed. He knew that though he might lack something for the moment, God would provide for his needs at the right time.Father,Because of Your perfect love and power, I have everything I need. I confess, Lord, I often feel like I’m lacking. I look for happiness in earthly possessions, people, or status. I seek comfort from temporary pleasures. I look at what I don’t have and think I’m missing something that would make me happy. But what I need is found in You. When I turn to You, You fill my soul with love and grace and make me complete. When I seek satisfaction from people or things, I’m left thirsty. In You, I find the fulfillment I’m looking for. You are enough. I love You Father! Thank You that in You I am complete.In Jesus’ Name,Amen“He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He refreshes my soul.”A good shepherd leads his sheep to a lush pasture with grass to eat and clean water to drink. A place where his animals feel safe and can lie down in peace.The Lord gives us spiritual nourishment by filling the empty places in our hearts and giving us peace and hope. He is our haven in the middle of life’s storms and refreshes our souls. When we come to Him with our confusion, brokenness, and pain, He restores us and carries us through our struggles.Lord,Thank You for being my refuge in the storm. Thank You for providing refreshment for my soul when I’m battered and torn by circumstances. You are my spiritual food, my living water, and my place of rest. When trouble hits, help me slow down and trust you instead of running in circles looking for escape. Enable me to lie down in peace knowing You have my back.In Jesus’ Name,Amen“He guides me along the right paths for His name’s sake.”God is our guardian. He shows us the way to go and enables us to live to honor Him. When we seek Him and ask for wisdom, He answers.Lord,Please give me wisdom to live righteously. Help me to glorify You with the decisions I make. Direct me and keep me in step with Your Spirit. Thank You for showing me the way.In Jesus’ Name,Amen
“Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.”We experience some extremely dark valleys in this life. Times when the shadow of death feels like it will swallow us. But for those who are in Christ, evil can’t touch our souls. God is always with us. As a shepherd protects his sheep from predators with his staff, so our Shepherd protects our souls from Satan. We belong to Jesus Christ for eternity and no one can take us away.Father,Sometimes fear overtakes me and it feels like evil is winning. Help me remember You are always beside me, all around me, and in my heart. My soul is eternally safe in Your hands and no one can snatch it away. When I experience a time of pain or sorrow, I know I’m not alone. You give me the strength to endure. Your Spirit comforts me no matter what’s happening. Thank You for Your constant love.In Jesus’ Name,Amen“You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.”Imagine a soldier on the battlefield. Instead of grabbing a quick bite of an emergency meal, he looks ahead and sees his commander has laid out a banquet. There’s a beautiful table laid with delicious dishes. He sits down right in the presence of his enemies and enjoys a meal. How could he do that? Only if he had complete faith and trust in his commander. We don’t have to panic in front of our enemies, the devil and his demons. God’s Spirit is always with us and has provided a banquet of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, and self-control. Our part is to have faith and trust our Commander.In Scripture, being anointed with oil is a picture of God pouring His Holy Spirit on believers (NET Bible Notes). Oil flowing down one’s head and an overflowing cup are both pictures of abundance. God sent His Spirit to comfort, encourage, empower, and fill us to overflowing with His spiritual blessings.Holy Spirit,Thank You for giving me peace when the enemy offers anxiety. You help me love when he tempts me to hate. You offer joy when circumstances threaten depression. You’re my patience when I want to lash out. You give me all I need when I rely on You. You put Your shield around me when the enemy is throwing every poison dart of negative thoughts and fears. When I run to You in faith, I can sit at Your table in peace.In Jesus’ Name,Amen“Surely Your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life.”What a beautiful truth! His goodness and love, also translated as mercy or loving kindness, will be our constant companions.Father,Please soak this truth into my soul. Your goodness and love are always with me and will never leave. Remind me I can’t be separated from Your love. Empower me to stand on truth instead of my ever-changing feelings. Your love is a solid rock and a firm foundation which can’t be shaken, destroyed, or removed. Praise You Father! Thank You! I stand knowing I may get knocked down but I won’t be destroyed (2 Corinthians 4:9).In Jesus’ Name,Amen“And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.”The ultimate promise! We will live with Him forever.Jesus,Thank You for making it possible for me to live with You for eternity! Thank You for promising You are preparing a place for me and proclaiming, “I will come back and take You to be with me that you also may be where I am” (John 14:3). I know this life is fleeting, a puff of smoke compared to eternity. Focus my heart on the truth of my forever home with You.Praise You Lord![embedded content]Photo Credit: © Getty Images/Joaquin CorbalanSusan Aken writes devotions and articles for Wholly Loved Ministries, is an Oklahoma native who’s lived in Nebraska since 1987 and has been in public education for over thirty years. She and her husband have one son and a wonderful daughter-in-law. Besides writing she has a passion for special needs and prayer ministries. She enjoys time with family, reading, photography, movies, walking in nature, and a nice cup of tea. She believes life is a journey and we’re all in different places. Jesus is everything to her and it’s all about grace. Visit her at susanaken53.wordpress.com or on Facebook.This article is part of our larger Prayer resource meant to inspire and encourage your prayer life when you face uncertain times. Remember, the Holy Spirit intercedes for us and God knows your heart even if you can’t find the words to pray. Prayer for God’s HelpPrayer for StrengthPrayer for ProtectionMorning PrayersGood Night PrayersNow available is our new Daily Prayer devotional! An easy way to find start your day with prayer, read today’s prayer and sign up to receive by email. […]

God's Love

‘He Gave Himself for Me’: Preaching Definite Atonement to the Glory of God

ABSTRACT: The aim of biblical preaching is joining God in his ultimate purpose in all things — to display the fullness of his glory. The apex of God’s glory is the splendor of his grace as it reaches its climax in the glory of the cross. And the glory of the cross is the fullness of its definite achievement. Therefore, we diminish the glory of the cross and the glory of grace and the glory of God when we diminish definite atonement. But when it is preached and embraced in its biblical fullness, the glory of the work of Christ, the glory of the freedom and power of grace, and the glory of the being of God himself are wonderfully magnified.

For our ongoing series of feature articles for pastors and Christian leaders, John Piper explains why the full glory of the cross rests on the preaching of definite atonement.

If the ultimate end for which God created the world is the display of his glory, and if the apex of his glory is the splendor of his grace, and if the achievement of Christ on the cross is the climactic display of this splendid grace, and if “the glory of the cross is bound up with the effectiveness of its accomplishment,”1 then how we preach the achievement of the cross is a weightier matter than most of what we preach.2 When we do not preach the full atoning effect of the cross, we diminish the glory of the cross and fall short of God’s ultimate purpose in creation.

I do not mean that this diminishment necessarily cancels a person’s Christian faith, or even removes God’s blessing from someone’s ministry. God is merciful to use us in spite of many failings. I am sure that in many ways I fall short of God’s purpose to glorify himself in the cross. The point is not to nullify or undermine anyone’s faith or ministry. The point is to summon all of us to move toward magnifying more fully the majesty of the glory of the grace of God in the cross of Christ — and to do that by believing and proclaiming the full glory of Christ’s death in effectively purchasing his elect, expiating their guilt, and propitiating God’s wrath against them. Murray is right: “The glory of the cross is bound up with the effectiveness of its accomplishment.”

End for Which God Created the World

Reading the Dissertation Concerning the End for Which God Created the World by Jonathan Edwards was a worldview-transforming experience for me when I was in my twenties. I found the book — with its unparalleled saturation with Scripture — totally compelling, and I have spent most of my life trying to herald its main message.3 That message is clear: “All that is ever spoken of in the Scripture as an ultimate end of God’s works is included in that one phrase, ‘the glory of God’; which is the name by which the last end of God’s works is most commonly called in Scripture.”4 God does nothing without this as his chief end. The words of God in Isaiah 48:11 fly like a banner over every divine deed: “For my own sake, for my own sake, I do it, for how should my name be profaned? My glory I will not give to another.”

The glory of God is at the heart of the gospel. Faith sees and savors “the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God” (2 Corinthians 4:4). That is a remarkable phrase: “the gospel of the glory of Christ” — or as Paul says again two verses later, “the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ” (2 Corinthians 4:6). Whether he speaks of “the glory of Christ, who is the image of God” or “the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ,” the reality is the same. God’s glory revealed in Christ and his work is essential to what the gospel is. When we are dealing with the glory of God, we are dealing with a reality that is not only ultimate in the aim of history, but central to the gospel.

Central Task of Ministry and Aim of Preaching

All of this means that the central task of Christian ministry is the magnifying of the glory of God. The aim is that the fullness of the revelation of the glory of God be displayed for God’s people, and that they be helped to respond joyfully with the fullest admiration possible.

This means that preaching, which is essential to the life of the church, aims in every sermon to magnify the glory of God in Jesus, and to satisfy the deepest need of people to know and admire God. The fullness of what we need to know about God is found with clarity and surety in only one place, the Bible. Therefore, every sermon will be expository in the sense that it will try to bring the revelation of God’s glory to light through the meaning of biblical texts. And at the heart of all those texts is the supreme revelation of the glory of God through the manifestation of his grace in the work of Jesus Christ on the cross. Which brings us to the great reality of the atonement in relation to the glory of God in preaching.

Christ’s Death as the Climax of the Glory of God’s Grace

Now I can be more specific than I have been so far. I have said that God does all that he does to uphold and magnify and display his glory. Now I can go further and say that all his works exist to display the glory of his grace, and the cross of Christ is the climactic revelation of the glory of his grace, which is the apex of the glory of God.

“The central task of Christian ministry is the magnifying of the glory of God.”

What we are about to see from Scripture is that the revelation of the glory of God’s grace was planned before creation and came to its climax in the death of Christ for sinners. In conceiving a universe in which to display the glory of his grace, God did not choose “Plan B.” The death of Christ was not an afterthought or adjustment. For this the universe was planned. Everything leading to it, and everything flowing from it, is explained by it.

In Ephesians 1:4–6, Paul says,

[God] chose us in him [that is, in Christ] before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved.

From eternity to eternity, the goal of God in the history of redemption is to bring about the praise of the glory of his grace. But what is most relevant at this point is to notice that this plan happened “in Christ” (v. 4) or “through Jesus Christ” (v. 5) before the foundation of the world.

What does it mean that “in Christ” we were chosen and that our adoption was to happen “through Jesus Christ”? We know that in Paul’s mind Christ suffered and died as a Redeemer so that we might be adopted as children of God (Galatians 4:5). Our adoption could not happen apart from the death of Christ. Therefore, Paul means that to choose us “in Christ” and to plan to adopt us “through Jesus Christ” was to plan (before the foundation of the world) the suffering and death of his Son for sinners. And this was for the purpose of the praise of the glory of the grace of God (see Ephesians 1:6, 12, 14). Which means that the death of Jesus for sinners is the climax of the revelation of the glory of God’s grace.

Definite Atonement as a Significant Part of the Glory of Christ’s Achievement

The question before us in this article is whether definite atonement is a significant part of the glory of God’s grace that he intends to display in the atoning work of his Son. And if so, how does it affect our preaching for building up the body of Christ for the glory of God?

My answer is yes, the definite atoning work of Christ is a significant part of the glory of God’s grace. And to know this, by the working of God’s Spirit, enables us to preach in such a way that our people experience deeper gratitude, greater assurance, sweeter fellowship with God, stronger affections in worship, more love for people, and greater courage and sacrifice in witness and service. Preaching, which aims at these things to the glory of God, will speak of the cross in its fullness, not denying any of its universal implications, but also not denying its precious, definite, effective, invincible power to save God’s elect.

We have already seen Ephesians 1:4–6 point in this direction — that a significant part of the glory of Christ’s achievement is that it secures not the potential but the actual, total, and eternal salvation of God’s elect. We saw that God’s ultimate goal to glorify himself in creation reached its high point in the display of his grace “through Jesus Christ” (v. 5), that is, “in the Beloved” (v. 6). Now let us follow Paul’s thought a little further into the definiteness of Christ’s saving work that displays the glory of God’s grace.

From Ephesians 1:5, we see that God predestined sinners to adoption as sons: “He predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ.” I showed above that the words “through Jesus Christ” mean through the redeeming work of Jesus Christ (cf. Ephesians 1:7). This is how we know that God had sinners in view when he predestined his chosen ones for adoption. They needed redeeming. This means, then, that the redeeming work of Christ on the cross is what secures the passage of a person from lost sinner to adopted son — from being a child of wrath (Ephesians 2:3) to being a child of God. Thus, the glory of God’s grace, displayed in the achievement of the cross, is also displayed in the blood-bought passage of a lost person from death to life.

What is involved in that passage is explained by Paul in Ephesians 2:4–5. We see there that it is God’s grace that makes the dead live. “God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ — by grace you have been saved.” Paul breaks into the flow of his sentence (signified in English with a parenthetical dash) to make sure that we realize that the act of making the spiritually dead to live is the work of God’s grace. This is what is involved in the transition from being a child of wrath to being a child of God. One must be made alive spiritually. And Paul says that this is the work of God’s grace. This is why it is often called sovereign grace: it raises the dead. The dead do not raise themselves. God does by his grace. And it is this “glorious grace” that will be praised for all eternity.

What makes this so relevant for definite atonement is that God does not raise everyone from spiritual death. He raises those whom “he predestined . . . for adoption to himself as sons” (Ephesians 1:5). And since the grace by which he does this is “through Jesus Christ” (that is, through his atoning work), the quickening they experience is secured for them by the death of Christ on their behalf. This means that in the atonement God designed and secured spiritual life, and its resulting faith, for those whom he predestined to sonship.5 The atonement does not make possible the spiritual quickening of all people; it makes certain and effective the spiritual quickening of the elect. That is the conclusion of Paul’s teaching on grace in Ephesians 1:4–6 and 2:4–5.

So, in answer to the question, “Is definite atonement a significant part of the glory of God’s grace that he intends to display in the atoning work of his Son?” we may say yes. And our first reason for this answer is that the way God planned to magnify the glory of his grace is by predestining sinners to sonship through that blood-bought grace (Ephesians 1:5–6). And the way he planned to bring sinners to sonship was by the power of this grace in raising them spiritually from the dead and making them alive in Christ (Ephesians 2:5).

“The glory of Christ’s achievement is that it secures not the potential but the actual salvation of God’s elect.”

Thus, “the glory of his grace,” which has been God’s aim from all eternity, includes the glorious design and power of the atonement to secure the faith and salvation of his elect. The blood-bought grace of God makes alive the dead, brings them into union with Christ, awakens faith, and saves his own to the uttermost. In other words, it is not just redemption accomplished at the cross that brings glory to God, but redemption accomplished and applied to the believer that is “to the praise of his glorious grace” (Ephesians 1:6).

God’s Love and Definite Atonement

Ephesians 2:4–5 says that God’s making us alive is owing to his “great love”: “God . . . because of the great love with which he loved us . . . made us alive together with Christ.” Paul’s understanding of the unique love of God for his elect, expressed in the effective work of the atonement for them in particular, shows how essential definite atonement is in the glory of the cross, which is the greatest act of divine love (Romans 5:8).

In a sense, I have been talking about the love of God from the very beginning of this article, because the grace of God is an expression of his love. It is the form love takes when it meets guilty people. But here in Ephesians 2:4, Paul makes explicit that the working of grace to make spiritually dead people alive is an expression of God’s “great love.” This is a unique expression in the Bible. God’s great love “with which he loved us” prompted him to make us alive when we were dead.

This means that there is a unique love of God for his elect that accounts for the unique effect of definite atonement in saving them. We have already seen that the sovereign grace that makes the dead live is a blood-bought grace flowing to the elect from the divine purpose of the cross. We are made alive because the atonement secures it. Now we add this insight: this divine purpose of the cross is an expression of God’s “great love” for his elect. Others are not made alive. Therefore, this love is a distinguishing love. It is not given to all. It is given to sinners who are predestined for sonship.

Christ So Loved His Bride

We see this again in Ephesians 5:25: “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” A husband loves his wife in a way that is different from the way he loves other women. And Christ loves his bride, the church, in a way that is different from the way he loves other people. He “gave himself up for her.” In my preaching, this has been one of the most effective ways to help my people feel the preciousness of definite atonement as an expression of God’s distinguishing love for them. What would it be like for a wife, I ask them, to think that her husband loves her only the way he loves all other women? It would be disheartening. He chose her. He wooed her. He took the initiative because he set his favor on her from all the others. He has a distinguishing love for her — a great love — that is unique. She is his own loved treasure like no other woman. And so, God’s elect are his own loved and blood-bought people as none others are.

I tell my people, you will never know how much God loves you if you continue to think of his love for you as only one instance of his love for all the world. To be sure, God loves the world (John 3:16), but there is a “great love” for his children that he does not have for the world. Nor should anyone say (changing the metaphor from bride to children) that he has this special love for his children because they believe in him. That is backward. Rather, spiritually dead children of wrath were made alive and brought to faith because he had this special love for them (Ephesians 2:4). This is the wonder of it. God set his electing, atoning love on us before we were able to do anything to commend ourselves to him.

When we preach, we long for our people to feel loved with the fullness of God’s love for them. The Arminian and Amyraldian6 ways of thinking make this experience difficult, if not impossible. They obscure the truth that it was precisely the distinguishing “great love” of God (Ephesians 2:4), expressed in the death of Christ, by which God brings his elect to life and gives them faith.

“God loves the world, but there is a ‘great love’ for his children that he does not have for the world.”

Both views make it harder for the children of God to read Galatians 2:20 with the personal sweetness God intended: “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” He loved me. He gave himself for me. The preciousness of this personal love is muted where it is seen as an instance of the same love that Christ has for those who finally perish. It is not the same.

His Sheep, His Friends, His Own

When John said of Jesus, “Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end” (John 13:1), he did not mean that this personal love for “his own” was the same as the love he had for everyone. He had a “great love” for his own. There was none greater. “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). Whatever blessings flow to the world from the cross of Christ, and they are many, there was in its design a “great love” specifically intended to rescue “his own.”

The Father had chosen his own out of the world and given them to the Son. “Yours they were, and you gave them to me” (John 17:6). He loved them to the end and kept them, so that none was lost. “This is the will of him who sent me, that I should lose nothing of all that he has given me” (John 6:39). To that end, he consecrated himself the night before his death: “For their sake I consecrate myself, that they also may be sanctified in truth” (John 17:19). And then he prayed for them — only for them, not for the world — since this was part of the “great love” he had for “his own”: “I am praying for them. I am not praying for the world but for those whom you have given me, for they are yours” (John 17:9). And then he died for them. “I know my own and my own know me . . . and I lay down my life for the sheep” (John 10:14–15). He “[laid] down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). This is what it means that “having loved his own . . . he loved them to the end” (John 13:1).

And in the mind of Christ, this achievement for “his own” was no small part of the glory he was bringing to the Father in his saving work. “I glorified you on earth, having accomplished the work that you gave me to do” (John 17:4). It was the perfect and complete salvation of “his own” that caused him to say to the Father, “All mine are yours, and yours are mine, and I am glorified in them” (John 17:10). This glory was not the glory of a salvation made available, but a salvation made real and effective in the lives of “his own.” The love of God for his elect is greater than the love he has for the world. As Geerhardus Vos comments, “The divine love for the elect is different not only in degree but specifically from all other forms of love, because it involves a purpose to save, of which all the other forms fall short.”7 Therefore, the greatness of this special love — expressed in the definite effectiveness of the atonement — is a great part of God’s glory in saving his people through the death of Christ.

Preaching Definite Atonement for the Body of Christ

That Christ died and rose again to accomplish this definite, full, and irreversible atonement for his people is the glory of his cross, which is the climax of the glory of grace, which is the apex of the glory of God. This is how I began this article. And I said there that this vision of the atoning work of Christ enables us to preach in such a way that our people experience deeper gratitude, greater assurance, sweeter fellowship with God, stronger affections in worship, more love for people, and greater courage and sacrifice in witness and service. Let me flesh this out briefly.

“The love of God for his elect is greater than the love he has for the world.”

With this vision of Christ’s achievement, we will aim in all our preaching to magnify the glory of Christ by helping our people realize the unspeakably great benefits that come to them because of this achievement. Our aim will be to help our people know and experience the reality of a definite, full, and irreversible atonement. If God gives us success, here is some of what it will mean for us and our people.

Knowing and experiencing the reality of definite atonement affects us with deeper gratitude. We feel more thankfulness for a gift given to us in particular, rather than feeling like it was given to no specific people and we happened to pick it up. The world should be thankful that God so loved the world that he gave his only Son so that whoever believes may not perish but have eternal life. But those who belong to Christ should be far more thankful because the very faith that unites us to Christ was purchased and secured by his blood.

Knowing and experiencing the reality of definite atonement affects us with greater assurance. We feel more secure in God’s hands when we know that, before we believed or even existed, God had us in view when he planned to pay with his blood, not only for a free offer of salvation but also for our actual regeneration and calling and faith and justification and sanctification and glorification — that it was all secured forever for us in particular. The rock-solid assurance of Romans 8:32–39 (“Who shall bring any charge against [us]! . . . Who shall separate us! . . .”) is rooted in the unbreakable link between the definite atonement that Christ made (“He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all . . .”) and the promises purchased for those for whom he died (“. . . how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? ”).

Knowing and experiencing the reality of definite atonement affects us with sweeter fellowship with God. A pastor may love all the women in his church. But his wife feels a sweeter affection for him because he chose her particularly out of all the other women, and made great sacrifices to make sure he would have her — not because he offered himself to all women and she accepted, but because he sought her in particular and sacrificed for her. If we do not know that God chose us as his Son’s “wife” and made great sacrifices for us in particular and wooed us and wanted us in a special way, our experience of the personal sweetness of his love will not be the same.

Knowing and experiencing the reality of definite atonement affects us with stronger affections in worship. To be loved with everlasting love, before creation and into the future ages, is to have our affections awakened for God that will intensify worship and make it more personal than if we thought we were loved only with the same love as God has for those who will never come. To look at the cross and know that this love was not only for the sake of an offer of salvation to all (which it is), but more, was the length to which God would go so that I, in particular, would be drawn into this salvation — that is the bedrock of joy in worship.

When the psalmist says in Psalm 115:1, “Not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to your name give glory, for the sake of your steadfast love and your faithfulness!” he makes it clear that the worship of God — the glorification of God — springs from a vital sense of his steadfast love and faithfulness. When a church is faithfully and regularly taught that they are the definite and particular objects of God’s “great love” (Ephesians 2:4), owing to nothing in them, the intensity of their worship will grow ever deeper.

Knowing and experiencing the reality of definite atonement affects us with more love for people and greater courage and sacrifice in witness and service. When a profound sense of undeserved, particular, atoning love from God combines with the unshakable security of being purchased — from eternity, for eternity — then we are more deeply freed from the selfish greed and fear that hinder love. Love is laying down one’s conveniences, and even one’s life, for the good of others, especially their eternal good. The more undeservingly secure we are, the more we will be humbled to count others more significant than ourselves, and the more fearless we will be to risk our lives for their greatest good. Definite atonement is a massively strengthening truth for the humble security and bold fearlessness of the believer. In that way, it releases and empowers love.

Preach the Fullness of Definite Atonement

The list of benefits could go on, but the implication for preaching is clear. Preaching, which aims to strengthen the people of God in the ways we have seen, should speak of the achievement of the cross in its fullness. The aim of this preaching is to join God in his ultimate purpose in all things — to display the fullness of his glory. We have seen that the apex of God’s glory is the splendor of his grace as it reaches its climax in the glory of the cross. And the glory of the cross is the fullness of its definite achievement. Therefore, we diminish the glory of the cross and the glory of grace and the glory of God when we diminish definite atonement. But when it is preached and embraced in its biblical fullness, the glory of the work of Christ, the glory of the freedom and power of grace, and the glory of the being of God himself are wonderfully magnified. […]

God's Love

The Way of the Essenes – FaithGateway

About 150 years before the birth of Jesus the Messiah, some of God’s people — the Essenes — established a community in the Judea Wilderness near the northern end of the Dead Sea. We know it as Qumran, where the Dead Sea Scrolls were found. Not all scholars agree that Essenes lived at Qumran, wrote the Dead Sea Scrolls, or were the people the scrolls portray, so study and debate about the nature of the community continue. However, given the lack of other significant theories about Qumran, the scrolls, and the Essenes, we will take the position of mainstream Bible scholars that the Qumran ruins are those of the Dead Sea Scroll community that was part of a religious movement that included the Essenes.
In any case, our primary focus is not on the relationship between the people who lived in this community and the Dead Sea Scrolls. We will focus on why this group of God’s people went into the desert to live as they did. We want to know the role they played in God’s great story of redemption.
Part of the answer is revealed in the Hebrew Bible where the proph­ets proclaimed God’s command for his people to “prepare the way” for His coming. Malachi wrote that God would come after He sent His messenger to prepare His way (Malachi 3:1). The words of Isaiah add further insight:
In the desert prepare the way for the Lord; make straight in the wilderness a highway for our God. — Isaiah 40:3
The Essenes were passionately committed to learning and obeying every word that came from the mouth of God. They knew that God wanted to dwell among them and believed with all their heart, soul, and strength that if they prepared the way He would come. So they eagerly anticipated the coming of the Messiah and went into the des­ert to “prepare the way” for Him.

The Essenes spent long hours in the brutal desert heart writing on parchment. Their writings included books from the Hebrew Bible, commentaries on these books, and the regulations of the Essene community.
But anyone who has hiked the rugged mountains of the Judea Wil­derness will likely ask, “Why did the way for God have to be pre­ pared in the desert, especially this one?” Throughout history this wilderness has remained virtually uninhabited. Its rough, steep ter­rain and lack of water make it unsuitable for good travel routes. Its summer heat frequently exceeds 120 degrees Fahrenheit, hot winds often dry out any remaining moisture, and chilling temperatures set in soon after sunset.
Wouldn’t it have been easier for God’s way to be prepared in the fer­tile countryside near the Sea of Galilee or the well­-watered hillsides near Jerusalem? Why did God choose the desert as the place for His people to prepare for His glory to be revealed? Why did He choose a place where simply surviving is so hard?
Again, part of the answer can be found in the Hebrew Bible. In the exodus story, God worked through His prophet Moses to miracu­lously bring the Hebrews out of slavery in Egypt, deliver them from Pharaoh’s army at the Red Sea, and lead them into the “vast and dreadful desert” (Deuteronomy 8:15) where He met with them and lived among them for forty years. In the desert, they learned to depend on God and live by His every word. Isolated from the influ­ence of Egyptian and Canaanite cultures, the Israelites became a unified people whom God molded and shaped to be a kingdom of priests who would display His character to the world.
In a sense, the desert is the perfect place for God’s people (including us today) to learn to be His people. In the desert, the diversions of a comfortable lifestyle fade into silence, and God’s powerful whisper can be heard. In the desert, we can survive — and even thrive — but only by God’s faithful provision. In the desert, we learn that it is better to be in the arms of God during tough circum­stances than to rest in paradise and forget about Him. In the desert, the influence of gods of our own making lose their power, and we are drawn into intimate relationship with the one true God.

The Essenes left upper-class lifestyles for huts in the harsh wilderness of Judea, a measure of their extreme devotion to the Bible. The Essene members were male, however there is evidence that they lived in the desert with their families as they prepared the Lord’s way of obedience.
So we should not be surprised to find the Essenes in the desert. There, for weeks, months, years — and sometimes a lifetime — they exchanged lives of relative comfort for desert hardships in order to live out their passionate commitment to obey every word that came from the mouth of God. There, they created a community isolated from the self-­focused, pleasure-­seeking Hellenistic society and what had become a corrupt priesthood in Jerusalem. In the desert they dedicated themselves to preparing the way for God.
And out of that same barren desert, the Bible character we know as John the Baptist took up the cry. With the fiery passion of Elijah, he called on sinners to repent and prepare the way for the Lord. And just as the prophets had said, God came as Jesus the Messiah to con­tinue the next chapter in God’s great redemptive story.
Watch Session 1: The Path to the Cross[embedded content]
Opening Thoughts (3 minutes)
The Very Words of God
A voice of one calling: “In the desert prepare the way for the Lord; make straight in the wilderness a highway for our God. Every valley shall be raised up, every mountain and hill made low; the rough ground shall become level, the rugged places a plain. And the glory of the Lord will be revealed, and all mankind together will see it. For the mouth of the Lord has spoken. — Isaiah 40:3-5
Think about it
Take a few moments to think about your image of what it means to love God and live for Him, then describe what you think a life of pas­sionate obedience and faithful devotion to God looks like.
What sacrifices might be required in order to obey God and love Him with all our heart, soul, and strength?
DVD notes (29 minutes)
God shapes and molds His people in the desert
The Essene community: learning to live by God’s every word
The Essene lifestyle: passionate obedience and intense devotion
Prepare the way for the Lord
DVD discussion (7 minutes)

At times God chose to use harsh desert areas near the Prom­ised Land as a training ground to mold and shape His people for their role in the next chapter of his unfolding story. Like a shepherd, He led the ancient Israelites through the deserts of the Sinai Peninsula to teach them to depend on Him and live by His every word. Moses and Elijah spent time with God in the Sinai deserts. Elijah, David, John the Baptist, and Jesus spent time with God in the Judea Wilderness. The Essenes went into that same wilderness to prepare the way of the Lord — to know His words and obediently “walk” His path.

On the map, locate the Dead Sea, Jerusalem, Hebron, Bethlehem, En Gedi, Qumran, and Jericho. Next locate specific desert areas in the region: Judea Wilderness (Judah Wilderness in Old Testament times), Desert of Zin, Negev, Desert of Paran, Desert of Sin, Desert of Shur. How far was the Judea Wilderness from Jerusalem? From Bethle­hem?

In what ways does the Essenes’ level of dedication, commit­ment, and faithfulness in seeking to obey every word of God make an impact on you?
How does the extent of their personal sacrifice help you to comprehend how much they valued the opportunity to par­ticipate in preparing the way for the coming of the Lord?

In what way(s) do you think the desert wilderness setting helped to fulfill the deep spiritual commitments that defined the Essene community?
Do you think the Essenes could have accomplished their objectives in a more hospitable environment? Why or why not?

Small Group Bible Discovery and Discussion
(15 minutes)
The Path of Obedience
God brought the ancient Hebrews into the desert to teach them how to obey His words and, by their obedience to His words, to walk in His ways. His words were so important that He instructed Moses to write down all of them in the Torah (Deuteronomy 31:9-13). God also instructed His people to return to the desert — either literally or by recalling the Hebrews’ time there — in order to remember (obey) His every word and to prepare the way (or path) for His coming.
The Essenes acted on these words. They dedicated themselves to walking the path of obedience. With great passion for obeying God, they willingly endured the desert hardships in order to learn to live by His every word. They had an intense desire to prepare the way for their God in the desert, and their faithful obedience greatly impacted their world. It helped to prepare people to more easily understand and apply the teachings of Jesus and influenced the theological climate of the Jews for about two hundred years. Let’s consider what it means to walk the path of obedience and “prepare the way” for God.

A desert path near Oumran in the Judea Wilderness provides an image of the desire and commitment required to walk the path of obedience and “prepare the way” for God.

The discipline of desert life may seem especially harsh to us. So to better understand the way of the Essenes, it will be helpful to revisit why God allowed the ancient Israelites to experience hard times in the desert. From God’s perspec­tive, how important was it — and how great a price was it worth — for his people to learn to live by his every word? (See Deuteronomy 8:2 – 3.)

For Greater Understanding: The “Way of the Lord”
Writers of the ancient Hebrew text used concrete language to describe God and the character He expects of His people. They frequently used halak (“walk”) and derekh (“path” or “way”) to describe a person’s daily life and relationship with God. So rather than saying “Live a good life” as Westerners might say, a writer of the biblical text might say something like “Walk a good walk” or “Walk in the path.”
For the Israelites, walking was the primary means of transportation. Sometimes walking was hard and sometimes it was easy. A person could choose one path or another. So the Israelites readily understood what it meant to “walk in the way.” Just as we choose a path when we “walk” from one place to another, we choose a lifestyle “path” as we journey through life. The Bible describes an obedient and righteous lifestyle as “God’s path” or the “way of the Lord” (Genesis 18:19) and a rebellious and sinful lifestyle as our “own way” (Isaiah 53:6) or “the way of the wicked” (Psalm 1:6).
In addition to meaning “path,” derekh can refer to a major road or a path that is worn by constant walking. The word is also translated “obedience” and “commands.” So when God told his people to walk in His “ways” as He had taught them, He wanted them to learn to walk His right path or road by obeying His commands. To walk in the way of the Lord is to obey His words.
God, too, has a derekh (Isaiah 40:3). If we desire to walk with God, he wants us to prepare his way — his path — by walking obediently in it. The Essenes went into the desert to prepare the derekh, or way, of the Lord. They prepared the way by walking in His path, which they accomplished by obeying His every word.

When Moses recorded how God wanted His people to live, He repeatedly told them to walk in the way God had taught them. As you read the following portions of the text, take note of how God’s people are to walk in His ways. Then dis­cuss specific examples of what it might look like for God’s people today to follow these instructions.

What motivated the Essenes to live as they did in the desert? Part of the answer is found in Isaiah 40:3-8, which should be especially meaningful in light of what you have learned about walking in the way of the Lord.

What did Isaiah call God’s people to do?
Where are God’s people to do it?
How would you expect God’s people to accomplish their task, and what is central to walking in God’s path?
In light of this, why do you think that the Essenes wrote and/or collected the Dead Sea Scrolls, many of which are copies of books of the Hebrew Bible or studies of these books?

Faith Lesson (5 minutes)
God led the ancient Hebrews into the desert so that they would learn to walk the right paths — His paths — by faithful obedience to His “words.” His inspired words have remained central to the shap­ing and molding of His people. His words were essential to the walk of the Essenes, they were essential to the walk of Jesus, and they are essential to those of us who seek to follow Him today. God’s words are so important that when Jesus faced Satan’s temptations in the desert, He repeatedly said, “It is written” (Matthew 4:4, Matthew 4:7, Matthew 4:10) and then quoted the very words God gave to the ancient Hebrews in the desert!

What does Jesus’ response to Satan’s temptations reveal to you about the foundational importance of the lessons of the exodus?
Try to imagine how highly Jesus valued God’s words and how deeply committed He was to walk faithfully on God’s path.

What kind of attitude and energy do you imagine Jesus brought to his study of God’s words? What do you think was foremost in His mind and heart as He studied God’s words and set out to obey them?
Describe what living out a commitment to obeying every word from the mouth of God might have looked like in Jesus’ daily life and what it might look like for you.
Consider what you have learned about the fire in the soul of the Essenes that drove them into the desert to make what­ ever sacrifices necessary to walk with God and obey His word. In what ways might their example inspire you to make similar sacrifices?

What would those sacrifices be?
In what ways would you expect your life to be different if you, following the example of the Essenes and Jesus, devoted yourself to obeying God’s Word and walking in His way?
To what extent are you sold out enough to God and to His Word to make the sacrifices required to walk the path of obedience and prepare the way of the Lord?
Closing (1 minute)
Read together Deuteronomy 28:9-10:
The Lord will establish you as His holy people, as He promised you on oath, if you keep the commands of the Lord your God and walk in His ways. Then all the peoples on earth will see that you are called by the name of the Lord.
Then pray together, testifying to God and to one another of your desire to walk in God’s ways. Ask God for the strength to fulfill your commitment to learn and obey His every word. Ask Him to bless your walk so that other people will come to know Him.
* * *
Your Turn
Come share your thoughts with us on our blog. We want to hear from you! […]

God's Love

Selah – FaithGateway

I HELD MY BREATH.
My boyfriend and I had been talking about it for weeks, but honestly, I had hoped he’d forgotten about it. I slowly sauntered through the aisles of my favorite store, pausing in front of a line of curly haircare products.
“I think we should take that break,” he suggested.I paused and took a deep breath. “Okay,” I hesitantly replied. “We both need some time away to make sure that we’re hearing from God regarding our next steps.” “How long?”
“I’m thinking four weeks of no talking, followed by three weeks of text only. So seven weeks total.”
We set a date and stuck to it: July 11, 2017.
When we had our last conversation just before midnight, I began pacing the streets of Monroe Park in Washington, D.C. And then the clock struck midnight. There I was, alone. My safety net robed in human flesh, now gone.
Little did I know that God would use those seven weeks to orchestrate a radical shift in my life that would allow me to start over. The safety that I had found in my life just twenty-four hours prior would never again exist.
A few days after the beginning of our temporary break, my world began shifting. One bad product launch led to the prospect of either raising more capital for my business or making the difficult decision to sell. I spent weeks oscillating between babbling tears and steady composure. I was failing miserably. And to make matters worse, I couldn’t speak to the one person who knew me best. The most important decision of my life would be made without the person who held my security in his hands. At the end of the four weeks, the decision was final: I was selling the company.
I cried aloud to the Lord, and he answered me from his holy hill. Selah. — Psalm 3:4
Zimism – God will orchestrate circumstances to force your pause.
But would I have really made the decision to sell if I bounced this idea off of him beforehand? Probably not. You see,
God orchestrated this painful season in my life to bring me to a single moment of solitude
— a pivotal decision-making moment. And in that moment, He tested me. I would either run or stand.
The word selah is mentioned roughly seventy-four times in the Bible. Although its exact meaning is unknown, many scholars agree that its meaning necessitates two things: a pause and a praise.
But I didn’t feel like praising.
One by one, the team with whom I had built my successful company began to submit their resignation letters. Their faith in my leadership had all but diminished. My decision to keep our business small meant that we weren’t exploring new channels at a fast-enough pace, and my desire to keep a business centered on Christ wasn’t working either.
I was stubborn. A perfectionist even. My leadership training, despite my best efforts, wasn’t sticking. And as hard as I tried, I felt like no one understood me.
If I truly wanted to build something God-centered, I had to give up what wasn’t.
In a little under sixty days, the papers were signed. The deal was done. I no longer owned the company I started. In the months that followed, everything that my team had worked so hard to build became unrecognizable. I felt isolated and alone, with no one to talk to. I went through one of the greatest transformations of my life during this time, and all I could do was retreat and reflect on my failures and what I could have done differently — or what I might do differently now if given the chance.
I had given up what had been the most important marker of my identity for the past four years. Even though what I did was a sacrifice unto God, the darkest period of my life didn’t feel like an apt reward. I gave up my security. I felt abandoned by industry friends. I felt like less of myself than ever. And as much as I wanted out of the struggle, I stayed.
DON’T GUT THE FISH
The book of Jonah chronicles a man of the same name who rebelled against the instructions of God and fled from Nineveh. He was tossed into a tumultuous sea, only to be swallowed by a giant fish that God had appointed. Inside the fish’s belly, Jonah was faced with a decision: he could either force his way out of the fish — gutting it from the inside out — or he could embrace the stillness.
The situation couldn’t have been comfortable for Jonah. It was probably terrifying. He probably felt stranded, trapped on all sides even. But as he prayed to God, he didn’t pray for deliverance, like many would have.
It was only while being still, inside the fish, that he received revelation. There he was, trapped in the belly of this creature for three days and three nights. Instead of trying to escape, he made a declaration. He acknowledged his own shortcomings and thanked God, offering up a sacrifice of praise and proclaiming that God had the final say. Salvation belonged to Him.
Instead of trying to escape, he made a declaration.
In times like these, it’s important that we don’t find ourselves desiring deliverance more than revelation. Sometimes, when we don’t understand what’s happening around us, we just want the pain to stop. We want to press fast-forward on the season we’re currently in. We want to jump to the place where we already have the success, the money, and the prestige. We also want it without the pain, discomfort, or effort. Without the tears. Without the loneliness and isolation. But wanting out too early simply evades the process that God wants us to go through. It eliminates the growth we’ll experience if we stay the course.
Jonah fled God’s instruction because he knew that He was compassionate. He knew that God would forgive a nation that was wicked against Him. But it was that same compassion that led to his sympathetic prayer inside the belly of the fish.
Joseph, a man of God sold into slavery by his brothers, could interpret dreams. It was this same gift that allowed him to rise to power in the land of his affliction.
God has given each of us traits that we can use during hard times. There are countless examples of men and women of God being put to the test. But what is most noble and notable about their stories isn’t of their escape; it’s what happened when they endured. God has proven over and over that He will bless our endurance. He sees exactly what we’re going through and will respond at just the right time.
Zimism – The work that God wants to do in us requires both our pause and our praise.
And as much as we desire the rescue, we have to find comfort in the discord. The Bible tells us in Isaiah 66:9 that God will not cause pain without something new being born.
It is in the stillness of the storm that we will find peace.
It’s in the early mornings alone.It’s in our quiet time with the Lord.It’s in the silent sobs.
Refusing to gut the fish means that we’re committed to the assignment God has for us. It’s saying to God, “I know You brought me to this new place; I refuse to move back home.” It’s declaring that the goodness God has for us is just on the other side of the mission.
It is in the stillness of the storm that we will find peace.
When Jonah was delivered from the belly of the fish, he wasn’t regurgitated into the ocean to fend for himself. He didn’t have to swim miles back to shore. Even though he was tossed into the ocean in the middle of a storm, Jonah was delivered onto the safety of the shore. Jonah was delivered on firm ground with a fresh revelation of his assignment. “Then the word of the Lord came to Jonah the second time, saying, ‘Arise, go to Nineveh, that great city, and call out against it the message that I tell you’ ” (Jonah 3:1-2).
THE DARKEST HOURS
Even in our darkest hours, we are still under the protection of the Lord. We will never understand our purpose if we always gut the fish. Even Jesus retreated into solitude. And when He was tempted by the devil, He didn’t run. He stayed, eventually fulfilling His purpose.
What would have happened if I had gone running back to my boyfriend during our break? As godly a man as he was, God didn’t need someone else clouding my judgment or testing my obedience. He needed me to stay put and trust in His sovereignty.
If I hadn’t obeyed God and made that tough decision to sell, I wouldn’t be writing this book. I wouldn’t have had the crisis of faith that led me to a deeper relationship with Him. I wouldn’t be free from the opinions of other people. I wouldn’t have stayed in Chicago. And I wouldn’t have the depth and meaning in my marriage that I do now.
All that the Lord blessed me with was a direct result of my commitment to staying in the belly of the fish — not begging for deliverance but thanking God for the blessings to come. I thank Him — not for the hardship but for the assignment.
Choosing not to gut the fish is perhaps the most grueling part of it all. We know that God sees what’s happening, and sometimes it seems like cruel and unusual punishment. But how else will God grow us? Certainly not by laying out His entire plan in front of our eyes.
Zimism – Your God-given gifts will make room for unexpected pockets of grace for when you need it most.
Excerpted with permission from Dare to Bloom by Zim Flores, copyright Zimuzor Flores.
* * *
Your Turn
Are you going through a trial? Don’t gut the fish to try to escape your situation! Ask the Lord to develop you and hone you instead as you praise Him. Pause. Shift your perspective. Focus on Jesus! ~ Devotionals Daily […]

God's Love

What Is Sweeter Than Honey? A Little Theology of Sugar

His eyes became bright. Jonathan put his sugar-coated hand to his mouth and displayed the power of one of God’s good gifts in his created world. It’s a power we all have known, indeed tasted, and yet many of us have grown so accustomed to it as to hardly recognize it anymore.

At that moment, what the weary, hungry army of Israel needed was fast energy. They “had been hard pressed that day” as they pursued the fleeing enemy, but their king, Saul, Jonathan’s father, made a rash vow: “Cursed be the man who eats food until it is evening and I am avenged on my enemies” (1 Samuel 14:24). In hot pursuit of their foe, the men entered a forest and found themselves surrounded by God’s provision: “behold, there was honey on the ground” (1 Samuel 14:25). Golden, viscous, liquid sugar — like the manna, which tasted of honey, that covered the ground for God’s people each morning in the wilderness (Exodus 16:14). God had provided. But Saul had made his foolish oath.

Jonathan, however, had not heard his father’s words. So he walked into the forest, received the divine gift, and “his eyes became bright” (1 Samuel 14:27). Just the quick energy he needed to finish off the foe. Just what the whole army needed.

Saul’s army did catch the enemy, and overcome them, but because of Saul’s rash vow not to eat, “the people were very faint.” In victory, they lost self-control, and “pounced on the spoil and took sheep and oxen and calves and slaughtered them on the ground. And the people ate them with the blood” (1 Samuel 14:31–32). What pain and misery they would have been spared if only, like Jonathan, they had “tasted a little honey” (1 Samuel 14:29, 43) to brighten their eyes and revive their strength.

In the end, their victory is not without grave and unnecessary difficulties. The people do redeem Jonathan from falling victim to the vow, and he declares his father’s folly:

My father has troubled the land. See how my eyes have become bright because I tasted a little of this honey. How much better if the people had eaten freely today of the spoil of their enemies that they found. For now the defeat among the Philistines has not been great. (1 Samuel 14:29–30)

“Honey is good — so good that it’s not good to eat much of it.”

Twice Jonathan says “a little honey.” Just a little did the trick. Too much would have made him all the worse for war. Yet, here, in this seemingly minor episode in the history of Israel, we have what might be an unnerving peek into our modern world, where we are surrounded by honey and have great difficulty limiting ourselves to just a little.

Spoonfuls of Sugar

From a historical perspective, it is stunning how much sugar we consume today. What came in a golden, sticky ooze in biblical times comes to us today as refined, white, granulated table sugar, already baked and boiled in excessive proportions into many of the foods and drinks we commonly consume. According to Jay Richards, “In 1700, Westerners ate very little sugar — say, four pounds per year. Even in 1850, we averaged only a few pounds per person per year. Now, each of us, on average, eats well over one hundred pounds of sugar per year . . . much of it in processed foods that don’t even taste sweet to us” (Eat, Fast, Feast, 42–43).

Estimates do vary. “Americans consume as much as 77.1 pounds of sugar and related sweeteners per person per year, according to the United States Department of Agriculture data” — but still — “That’s nearly twice the limit the department recommends, based on a 2,000-calorie diet” (“The Barbaric History of Sugar in America”). But what no one questions is that objectively, demonstrably, and almost without exception, we consume far more sugar today than humans have throughout history, barring only the last century.

Obesity among Americans has grown nearly 30 percent in just the last three decades, while the rate of diabetes has almost tripled. It would be naïve to consider sugar the only cause. And perhaps just as naïve to not consider the overconsumption of sugar to have played a significant, if not the major, part. And of course, none of us wants to hear that, because it just tastes so good.

Heavier, Slower, More Unhealthy

For many readers, this is not news. For more than a generation, a growing chorus of voices has been suspecting that “we are consuming way more sugar than our bodies are equipped to handle” (“What’s Wrong with the Modern Diet?”). “Equipped” — don’t miss that. By whom?

When dealing with the human body, it’s difficult for even the most ardent of evolutionists to avoid words like “equipped,” “built,” and “designed.” The human body and brain, with its abilities to move and adapt, is the most impressive masterpiece in all of physical creation, the crowning jewel, and culminating creation, of those first six days (Genesis 1:26–31).

God’s good design comes equipped to handle sugar — both the slow-release of glucose as digestion breaks down complex carbohydrates and its fast release from simple carbohydrates (none faster, and more difficult to handle, than when we drink sugar-water — soft drinks and juices).

Glucose, from sugar, can be a source of needed energy to the muscles, but it is toxic in the bloodstream. Our brains summon insulin to the rescue to remove it from our blood, and when muscles, which have little storage, are already well supplied, the sugar is converted to fat and stored in a nice central location — the waste and hips. Despite the popular myth that eating fat makes our bodies fat, it is the overconsumption of sugar, for most of us on the modern diet, that contributes far more to our undesired fat stores.

Tragically, generation by generation, those commissioned to image God in his created world are becoming heavier, slower, lazier, and more unhealthy, while a growing train of maladies like obesity, heart disease, high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, stroke, and cancer shorten and encumber this vapor’s breath of our lives even more than they already are.

Little Theology of Honey

Many today might be surprised to find that the Scriptures have timeless truths to speak into our modern malaise about sugar.

Sugarcane was rare in the Middle East in biblical times, and may receive an obscure reference in one or two texts (“sweet cane” in Isaiah 43:24; Jeremiah 6:20). But what was not obscure, and is one of the great concentrated sources of glucose still, with the same essential sweetness as table sugar, is honey. There is “a little theology of honey” in the pages of Scripture — and those of us confused today about what to do, and not do, for ourselves and for our children, might get some fresh help and orientation from the biblical principles.

Good: Eat Honey

The Proverbs give us two key orienting words. The first is Proverbs 24:13:

My son, eat honey, for it is good, and the drippings of the honeycomb are sweet to your taste.

Sugar, and its being “sweet to your taste,” is God’s idea and good design. Not only do we have the story of Jonathan’s eyes becoming bright — characterized as a good thing — but again and again, beginning at the burning bush (Exodus 3:8), God promises to give his people a land, he says, “flowing with milk and honey” — which is emphatically and manifestly a good gift.

Honey is identified with sweetness, pleasantness to the taste (Ezekiel 3:3; Revelation 10:9, 10), as a lion with strength (Judges 14:18). God provided not only nourishment for his people in the wilderness, but manna tasted good — “like wafers made with honey” (Exodus 16:31).

God’s first-covenant people treated honey as a valuable product and resource: among the “choice fruits of the land” (Genesis 43:11), fit to give a king (2 Samuel 17:29) or prophet (1 Kings 14:3), or God himself as firstfruits in worship (2 Chronicles 31:5). Honey could be a mark of prosperity and abundance (Isaiah 7:15, 22), even royalty (Ezekiel 16:13). “Honey” even became an endearing name a husband and wife might co-opt for each other, as did the lovers in the Song of Songs (4:11; 5:1), and still today.

Not Good: Much Honey

However, honey is powerful enough to come with user warnings. This should be no surprise to Christians who have learned elsewhere — with marital intimacy, for instance — that God’s most precious, and sweetest, of gifts can be prime targets of our sinful world and flesh and the devil. Again, Proverbs sounds the orienting word:

It is not good to eat much honey, nor is it glorious to seek one’s own glory. A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls. (Proverbs 25:27–28)

Not good to eat much honey. The pronounced good of honey calls for the virtue of self-control, the absence of which will soon destroy the benefit. So also, another warning proceeds it, earlier in the same chapter: “If you have found honey, eat only enough for you, lest you have your fill of it and vomit it” (Proverbs 25:16).

Professor Slughorn’s warning to his Hogwarts students about “Liquid Luck” potion might just as well be applied to sugar: “Too much of a good thing, you know . . . highly toxic in large quantities. But when taken sparingly, and very occasionally . . .”

Sugar-Coated, Growing Fat

Just as Jonathan did well in the forest to have “a little honey,” and not much, so do we today, surrounded as we are by the forest of sugar that is modern life. As with sex and alcohol, we learn to take some of the greatest care with God’s greatest of gifts because they are so potent. Honey is good — so good that it’s not good to eat much of it.

“Unlike honey and sugar, you cannot have too much of the sweetness of God.”

Consider what that momentary sweetness in the mouth, whether honey or sugar, has come to represent in common speech. “Sugar-coated” is no compliment; sugar has become symbolic for “empty calories,” for a momentary pleasure with a “crash” soon to follow. Proverbs 5:3 even warns that “the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey.” There is a paradigm here: feeling good in the moment, with great regret and disgust to follow (Proverbs 9:17; 20:17; Job 20:12).

Even before God brought his people into that “land flowing with milk and honey,” he warned of what such luxuries would produce in them because of their sin — warnings we too should take seriously today. Over time, they would forget to handle his gifts with care:

When I have brought them into the land flowing with milk and honey, which I swore to give to their fathers, and they have eaten and are full and grown fat, they will turn to other gods and serve them, and despise me and break my covenant. (Deuteronomy 31:20)

In sin, God’s people came to presume his gifts and eventually forsake him. Even the “honey out of the rock” he provided to keep them alive in the wilderness (Deuteronomy 32:13; Psalm 81:16) they came to take lightly: “But Jeshurun grew fat, and kicked; you grew fat, stout, and sleek; then he forsook God who made him and scoffed at the Rock of his salvation” (Deuteronomy 32:15).

What We Learn from Sugar

Honey is indeed a divine creation and gift. Sugar is a good to handle with care. A gift from God to delight our tastes — and teach us of himself. Taste honey, he says. See how good it is, and ponder how the one who made it is every bit that good, and far better.

Not only is our God one who provides honey for his people in the wilderness, sweetness in the midst of our grueling times, but his words are “sweeter also than honey and drippings of the honeycomb” (Psalm 19:10). “How sweet are your words to my taste,” celebrates Psalm 119:103, “sweeter than honey to my mouth!”

And unlike honey and sugar, you cannot have too much of the sweetness of God. And our desire for more of him just might help with our penchant today to swing from overconsumption to overreaction and back.

A biblical theology of honey speaks a chastening word to both sides of today’s sugar divide. Apart from the guidance from God’s word, we are prone to gravitate to extremes: misusing God’s good gift through presumption and overconsumption, or misguided avoidance and overreaction, treating as evil, or simply toxic, what he has given as good.

Enjoy “a little honey” — it is good — so good that it’s not good to eat too much. […]

God's Love

You Don’t Need to Understand Now

Jesus spoke many profound and important words to his disciples the night before his crucifixion. But there’s one statement we might easily pass over, because of the context in which he made it. Yet it is loaded with personal meaning for each of us who follows him:

What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand. (John 13:7)

In that one sentence, Jesus captures a profound reality that is our frequent, and to some extent continual, experience as Christians: not understanding what God is doing (or not doing) and why. It’s crucial that we grasp the wider implications of what Jesus said here, for if we do, it will help each of us immensely during the times we wonder why our Good Shepherd is leading us down such confusing and painful paths.

We often do not know what God is doing now. And the crucial truth is, we don’t need to know what God is doing now to follow him in faith.

You Do Not Understand Now

During that Last Supper, Jesus did something strange. He removed his outer garments, tied a towel around his waist, grabbed a basin of water, and proceeded to wash each disciple’s feet. I doubt this hits any of us with the force it did the disciples since the cultural mores of that region and time are so distant and foreign to us. But to the disciples, it felt more than strange; it felt disorientingly inappropriate.

“We are never on more dangerous ground than when we believe we understand better than God.”

It sure did to Peter. All his life, he had understood that washing someone else’s feet was about as demeaning a task as anyone could perform — a task fit only for slaves, or, if lacking those, for children. It would have been disgraceful for men of honor. So, as he watched Jesus, the most honored Person in the world, humbling himself by taking the form of a common slave, washing off with his own holy hands God only knew what uncleanness clung to those feet, he felt indignant. This was completely backward! If anything, Peter should be on his knees washing his Lord’s feet.

When Jesus got to Peter, the earnest disciple pulled his feet back and asked, “Lord, do you wash my feet?” Jesus looked at Peter and with patient kindness replied, “What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand” (John 13:7).

And there it is: a massive principle for every Christian’s life of faith, indeed a summary of a motif woven throughout Scripture from beginning to end, captured in a simple reply to a confused disciple’s question.

Legacy of Little Understanding

Peter, in not understanding why Jesus was doing what he was doing at that moment, was in very good company. Redemptive history recounts story after story of saints finding themselves in this perplexing position, being forced to trust God to make sense of it later. Think of:

Abraham, having waited so long for Isaac, only to be instructed by God to offer the boy as a sacrifice (Genesis 22);
Jacob wrestling with God, and being lamed in the hip, just before he was to meet Esau (Genesis 32);
Joseph wondering what God was doing as his young adulthood wasted away in an Egyptian prison (Genesis 37–41);
Moses not understanding why God would choose him to lead Israel out of Egypt (Exodus 3–4);
Gideon being given far more than he could possibly handle (Judges 7);
Jehoshaphat being instructed to send a choir as his military vanguard against an overwhelming foe (2 Chronicles 20);
Nehemiah having to deal with so many seemingly unnecessary adversities, obstacles, and inefficiencies that slowed down the work in rebuilding Jerusalem’s walls (Nehemiah 4);
Joseph trying to navigate so many unforeseen, confusing detours in the first few years of Jesus’s life (Matthew 1–2);
The man born blind, who didn’t know until midlife what purposes God could possibly have in his suffering (John 9);
And Martha’s and Mary’s grief-laced bewilderment over why Jesus didn’t come to heal Lazarus (John 11).

Of course, that’s just a small sample. Not understanding what God is doing now (and having to wait till later to understand) is the experience, to greater or lesser degrees, of every saint in every age — whether “later” means within a few minutes, as it did for Peter during the Last Supper, or in the age to come, as it did for his fellow disciple James, who wasn’t delivered from execution (Acts 12:1–2). It is a necessary, humbling part of what it means for us to “walk by faith, not by sight” (2 Corinthians 5:7).

You Must Trust Me

Being content to not understand now doesn’t come naturally to us. It surely didn’t for Peter. He found Jesus’s reply perplexing. And patience not being one of his strong suits, he didn’t wish to wait till later to understand. So, he declared, “You shall never wash my feet” (John 13:8).

It seems to me that Peter simply didn’t want to dishonor his Lord. This may have been well-intended, but it was wrongheaded. In responding this way, Peter actually became guilty of what he was trying to avoid: dishonoring Jesus. For the great dishonor wasn’t Peter allowing Jesus to wash his feet; it was Peter’s not trusting what Jesus said. And this is a crucial point for us to note: We are never on more dangerous ground than when we believe we understand better than God.

“We don’t need to understand God’s purposes now; what we need to do is trust God’s purposes now.”

I think Jesus fully discerned Peter’s well-intended motive. But he also discerned the danger of Peter’s wrongheaded, overly self-confident tendency to trust his own understanding. Which is why Jesus’s response was so serious. It shocked Peter to his core. “If I do not wash you, you have no share with me” (John 13:8). No share with me. Distrust in this meant exclusion. Peter got the point immediately and repented by exclaiming, “Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!” (John 13:9).

And what was Jesus’s point? Peter, you must trust me. You must live by the ancient proverb, and trust what I say with all your heart, and not lean on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5). The only way you as a branch will abide and be fruitful in this Vine is if you believe my word (John 15:1–5, 7). If you insist that you must understand now before you will trust me, you will be like a branch broken off, and you will spiritually wither and die (John 15:6).

You Don’t Need to Understand Now

Many of the experiences that confound us as we follow Jesus feel far more painful and confusing than foot-washing. Peter would sympathize; most of his confounding experiences were far more painful and confusing than that too. Just think of what desolation was approaching for Peter in the hours following this brief mealtime interchange. Sometimes it’s lessons we learn in less extreme moments that stand in clearest relief and help steady us during more extreme ones.

The plain fact is, we often do not know what God is doing now. And the crucial truth is, we don’t need to know what God is doing now to follow him in faith. God has his reasons for concealing his purposes. Sometimes it has to do with his timing, as it did for Peter. And sometimes, because God’s ways and thoughts are so beyond ours (Isaiah 55:8–9), it’s simply God’s mercy toward us to withhold knowledge too heavy for us to bear.

We don’t need to understand God’s purposes now; what we need to do is trust God’s purposes now. For it is through our trust, not our own understanding, that God will direct us along our confusing paths (Proverbs 3:6). And we can trust him that later, when the time is right in the near or distant future, he will give us all the understanding we need. […]

FAMILY & MONEY

I Post Nudes On Reddit For Validation And My Boyfriend Doesn’t Know

My boyfriend hasn’t initiated sex in over two years. I’m 24 and can count the amount of times we’ve ‘done it’ on one hand, in the same period. This is how I got here.Our relationship started, four years ago, with the typical honeymoon phase of wild sex every day of the week, but as his career as an EDM (electronic dance music) producer took off, we spent months apart as he toured. We got used to not having sex and heated arguments tarnished the mood upon his return ­­– provoked by my growing insecurities over attention from other girls. He could never let go of my accusations and as his fame rocketed, my self-worth plummeted.Then came the physical problems. He developed a pain during sex and became afraid to try. I didn’t want to hurt him either and could empathise as I’d gone through a similar situation at 19 with vaginismus, a spasm in my pelvic floor muscles which meant sex was excruciating and literally impossible. My boyfriend started to avoid sex and develop performance anxiety even after the physical pain had stopped. It fell to me to initiate intimacy and he’d often refuse. Society tells us men want sex 24/7 but my boyfriend has truly lost all interest. In our many teary conversations, he’s admitted that if thinks about never having sex again for the rest of his life, it doesn’t bother him. He’s aware this is a deal breaker for me as I’m a sexual, tactile person and is crippled with guilt, but nothing seems to improve the situation. I can’t help but feel that perhaps he just isn’t attracted to me, even though he assures me he is.

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We’re too young for this. I need physical touch. But we’re best friends and I love him. I’m too embarrassed to talk it through with my friends, they’d never understand, which is when I first turned to Reddit. I joined a Dead Bedrooms support group for people going through sexual intimacy problems in their relationships and found some solace in speaking to others, though they’re usually all married middle-aged men, which makes me feel frustrated. I decided that sending nudes could be the answer. I needed my boyfriend to start seeing me as a sexual being. But how can you tell which images look good? I had no faith in my sex appeal at this point and the thought of sending photos that are meant to turn someone on to my friends was mortifying. At any rate, I needed an unbiased opinion.

I’m 24 and can count the amount of times we’ve ‘done it’ on one hand

Perhaps influenced by the various nude-positive Twitter communities I’m part of, where people are constantly posting their Only Fans accounts, I decided to share my naked photos on Reddit – always with my face covered. I deleted the first few within 10 minutes in a blind panic, but within seconds I’d received comments and followers. I couldn’t believe how positive they were. I re-uploaded them and received a hundred notifications at a time telling me how perfect I am. I had intended this to be a one-time thing, but I can’t stop. ‘You have the most perfect body I’ve ever seen.’‘I’m blown away.’‘You’re unreal.’Those are just the PG messages. The flattery is addictive. I kept posting and in three months gained nearly 3,000 followers. In the last month, it’s doubled. Of course, I receive raunchy messages that leave me queasy, of men telling me what they want to do to me, that they masturbate over me and requests for custom photos, but I never engage. I encourage ‘thoughtful conversations only’ in my bio and don’t consider this cheating. I never flirt. I still use Reddit to decide which photos to send to my boyfriend but it’s turned into a major source of validation. It’s been an awakening for me. Before, I never viewed myself as hot or sexy because I’m not curvy, but Reddit has helped me understand that little curves are beautiful too. I know that people like the way I look without seeing my face.

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I’ve always been told I’m pretty – and before the pandemic, I made a living off it as a promo girl at trade shows and events – but I’m forever haunted by comments from boys in school who compared my boy-ish frame to a brick wall. A combination of this and vaginismus meant I’ve rarely felt like a woman. Every boy I dated left me when they realised I couldn’t f*ck them. I tried everything to get my muscles to relax for sex, from alcohol to illegal drugs like MDMA, weed and prescription pills sourced over the dark web, but nothing worked. Now I can finally have sex and the person I love isn’t interested. It’s hard to shake that feeling of total worthlessness.

I had intended this to be a one-time thing, but I can’t stop

I haven’t worked as a promo girl since March 15, 2020 and all the compliments that used to fuel my confidence have vanished. I’m living back at my parents’ house finishing my university degree online, so this new ‘hobby’ is also a much-needed thrill. It’s empowering to feel desired and it’s an outlet for the sexual side I don’t get to express with my boyfriend. There have been times I’ve wanted to delete the entire account and I worry that it’s a sign of a complete lack of self-respect, but how can I when it alleviates my crippling self-doubt? Of course, I would be horrified if anyone I knew found out, I think about it everyday. But there is an unspoken agreement among the users of subreddits. To see NSFW (not safe for work) content you have to alter your account settings; it’s not your average Reddit account, so if you catch me on there, I’m catching you on there too. We’re both participating in this taboo and I think it’s just as embarrassing to be found out as a lurker.This is the one secret I have from my boyfriend. He once even joked that I probably have a secret Only Fans account, given the sheer volume of nudes I send to him. I could have come clean right then, but the words wouldn’t come out. None of the messages I get are a threat to our relationship and knowing this has helped me gain perspective on the overwhelming attention my boyfriend receives from his fame. I no longer feel insecure. I know that there is no person, no message, no comment that could ever stray me away from him and I now trust him when he tells me the same.If you’ve got a story that you think would work for The Secret Lives of Women, please email secretlives@elleuk.comLike this article? Sign up to our newsletter to get more articles like this delivered straight to your inbox.In need of more inspiration, thoughtful journalism and at-home beauty tips? Subscribe to ELLE’s print magazine today! SUBSCRIBE HERE

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FAMILY & MONEY

I’ve Got A “Designer Vagina” But My Boyfriend Doesn’t Know

Much of my early twenties are a haze but a one-night stand with some idiot called Jake has lived with me forever. As he traced his tongue down my stomach and twisted my knickers down I started to panic. Tipsy as I was, I didn’t have the coordination or reaction time to rearrange into a more ‘flattering’ position. Suddenly he was up close and personal with my vulva. Giggling, he said: “Do you want fries with that?” I died. It was true. I was deformed. Unlovable. Ugly. I can’t place the exact moment I started to become aware of my body. One minute I felt free and happy to frolic totally starkers and then… then there was shame. I guess it’s natural to start to feel self-conscious about your body as a teenager, but before I became sexually active, it was all about my size. My legs were too chunky, my boobs too small. My arms weren’t toned and my face was too round. I was so busy analysing what the world could see, I hadn’t even considered that my vulva might look different too.Despite my anxieties, as I grew into my teenage years, I flourished. Boys found me attractive and I embraced life as one of the ‘pretty girls’, with plenty of moochy coffee dates, dancefloor snogs and illicit fumbles. On the face of it, I had nothing to worry about – and for a long time I didn’t. Then I started having sex.My first love at 16 never mentioned how I looked – whether he noticed or not, I’ll never know. I guess he was hardly an anatomical expert either at that age. I’d never watched porn or seen many other vulvas so I didn’t even realise they were all different. What I did notice, however, was that occasionally, after intense sex, my inner lips (otherwise known as the labia minora), which already protruded from the outer lips (the labia majora), would bruise and swell. It was as if they had been inflated, like those party balloons that are twisted and tied into the shape of poodles. It was sore and uncomfortable. I was walking around with a heaviness between my legs and couldn’t have sex again until things had calmed down.

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That was my first inkling of trouble ‘downstairs’. Fast forward to the ‘burger and fries’ incident, past a late education in porn, an awakening to degrading blokey banter and the crushing realisation that not all vulvas are made equal and I had full blown body dysmorphia. I was too embarrassed to mention it to friends at the time (I was never good at vulnerability), plus there’s absolutely no way I’d have confided in relatives – we’re just not that sort of family.For years I did my research on the sly, then a platform called RealSelf appeared, a rabbit hole of all things plastic surgery-related. In this portal to perfection, reviews, community questions chats and cosmetic procedures are dissected and absorbed. The app became an obsession. I combed the site daily, trawling through labiaplasty ‘before and after’ pictures. I reckon I studied more vulvas in my year of research than most porn addicts manage in a lifetime. However, I never for a moment considered that this spectrum of flowers, all different shapes, sizes, colours and textures could all be beautiful.After more than 10 years of hiding my vulva, getting panic attacks when men tried to touch me intimately – or, God forbid, go down on me – I just couldn’t take it anymore. My surgery was never about having the perfect vulva, it was about allowing myself to live in sexual freedom.

I had full blown body dysmorphia

The first surgery appointment was liberating. I was taking steps to change and it felt fantastic. That said, just allowing a male to inspect my vulva – even in a professional capacity – was terrifying. He stretched my inner labia out like a butterfly (Jesus, I could have taken flight with those wings) and it was confirmed: ‘Yes, your labia minora are larger than average.’We discussed the options. He asked if I wanted to save any of the ‘lips’. My answer was a categorical ‘no’. Take them off, all of them. He acquiesced. However, he was reluctant to remove too much of the flesh surrounding my clit in case it inhibited my ability to orgasm. I’ve always climaxed easily so that was a no brainer for me. The only sticking point was the cost. At up to £4,000, it’s not cheap, but I’d squirrelled away a modest nest egg and figured that I’d wasted more over the years on overpriced cocktails, designer fripperies and unnecessary travel – none of which had made any lasting impact on my happiness.The surgery itself was a doddle. For some people, a labiaplasty might sound like a huge decision, but doubt never crossed my mind. I was on a mission. I booked a few days off work and took myself to the clinic. I was back home within 24 hours. I still didn’t confide in any friends because I didn’t want to explain myself. I didn’t want them thinking they could change my mind. Dosed up on meds, I hid myself away over the weekend, watching with naive curiosity and pride as my little cross-stitched labia began to heal.

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Obviously it took longer than that before I could even contemplate sex – up to six weeks, said the surgeon, gravely. I laughed: I’d not had sex in nearly a year at that stage, so what was an extra month or two? I can’t pretend that the aftermath wasn’t uncomfortable, but when you’ve craved something for so long you can ride out any pain. I was up and about within a week and my temporary social hiatus went unnoticed. It’s pretty easy to hide a secret when it’s in your pants.While my vulva doesn’t offend me now, undoing years of anxiety and body shame isn’t that easy. I’d imagined I would be parading the streets naked, high on cunnilingus and crotch confidence. The reality has been different. I’d forbidden any non-penetrative intimate contact for such a long time that I didn’t know where to start. I was single at the time of the surgery but am now in a relationship with a lovely guy who has zero idea what I’ve done. I still struggle to allow myself to be ‘seen’. I tense up when he tries to go down on me (mercifully, this isn’t often – I think he’s got the hint) and I’m reluctant to roam pants off. Baby steps, I’m working on it.

I still didn’t confide in any friends because I didn’t want to explain myself

But the world moves quickly. Before I had the surgery, a couple of years ago, the body positive movement had yet to really find its voice. Today, explicit conversations are two a penny. Innie…outie…those terms used to be how we’d describe belly buttons, right? Not anymore. A TikTok video in which @gabygabss, aka former Playboy Bunny Gabriella Scaringe, gives the lowdown on her ‘outie’ labia has recently gone viral, racking up over seven million plays. ‘My inner parts protrude a little more than my outward parts,’ Gabriella says. ‘They’re called the Arby’s sandwich or the burger, but every panini is beautiful! And I’ve only ever had compliments on my lil Arby’s roast beef.’ Her searing candour has resonated with thousands of women worldwide. I’m stunned that anyone could have been so brave. The fact that so many women are publicly engaging in an issue that has traumatised me for my entire life is powerful, and I’m proud – from a distance – of the sisterhood for owning the innie/outie debate. But this revolution doesn’t mean I am somehow bound to ‘fess up’.Does this make me a traitor to the feminist cause? I don’t think so. Society is starting to embrace both natural beauty and modification simultaneously, as an individual’s right to choose. I made a choice that worked for me and I don’t regret it.Call it pride or vanity – or just plain privacy – I see no upside in revealing what I’ve done to the wider world. The new shape of my vulva is not worth explaining to any men in my life and I’m working through my intimacy issues at my own pace. This secret is staying firmly under wraps, preferably silky ones by Agent Provocateur.If you’ve got a story that you think would work for The Secret Lives of Women, please email secretlives@elleuk.comLike this article? Sign up to our newsletter to get more articles like this delivered straight to your inbox.In need of more inspiration, thoughtful journalism and at-home beauty tips? Subscribe to ELLE’s print magazine today! SUBSCRIBE HERE

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God's Love

Where Does the Phrase ‘He Is Risen Indeed’ Come From?

If I could choose one fundamental hope Christians center our faith around, it would be Jesus’ proof that even death can be overcome. He is risen indeed, and lives! We have a Bible full of historical facts and promises as evidence.
Yes, we’re born with a finite earthly life, into what feels like a world of unknowns, but God knew the purpose from the very beginning. He offered his immeasurable power and inconceivable grace—in flesh and Spirit—to reconcile us to him eternally.
The fact that our Savior rose from the perceived grips of rejection, humiliation, abuse, and even death equips us to believe he will indeed make all things new (Revelations 21:5).
Christians celebrate the truth of the resurrection all year, but it comes sharply into focus each Easter. The empty cross takes on fresh significance as we revisit Jesus’ sacrifice during Holy Week.
And truly, a miracle so mind-blowing as resurrection from the grave bears repeating as we rejoice on Easter Sunday. As we proclaim “He is risen!” you may hear others doubly confirm, “He is risen indeed!”

But why is it worded this way? Let’s look at the history and heart of this phrase.
Photo Credit: © Unsplash/Yannick Pulver

The Meaning behind ‘He Is Risen Indeed’
The phrase “He is risen indeed” is actually a response that is part of a paschal greeting exchanged on Easter Sunday, primarily in Orthodox churches. And although divisions in denominations developed over history, Christians agree Christ is risen. It’s a gift we celebrate, regardless of how various churches plan Resurrection Sunday service, or over what weeks the occasion is honored.
The phrase as a paschal greeting is an Easter custom among Eastern Orthodox, Oriental Orthodox, Eastern Catholic, Latin Catholic, and Anglican Christians. Paschal is derived from the Greek word pascha, which is a transliteration of the Hebrew word pesach meaning Passover.
Pascha is the feast of the Resurrection of the Lord, during which fasting, processions, and chants are customary over a period of 12 weeks. Its timeframe doesn’t always precisely coincide with when the Western church celebrates Easter, but it commemorates the same divine resurrection.

During the feast of Pascha and throughout Ascension (a time known as Paschal season), the paschal greeting is exchanged around the world in over 50 languages. It’s heard informally during this time, and also recited during liturgical services in churches. Instead of greeting one another with typical hellos, the greeting begins with “Christ is risen!” And the given response is “He is risen, indeed!” or “Truly, he is risen!”
Some cultures (Russians, for example), also exchange a “triple kiss of peace” after the greeting. The kiss of peace is an ancient traditional Christian greeting, sometimes called a “holy kiss.” It signifies a blessing of “peace be with you.”
This greeting of “Christ is risen,” met with “He is risen indeed,” is an act of unity around the belief in Christ’s resurrection.
Is ‘Risen Indeed’ in the Bible?
It’s interesting to note that the Eastern Orthodox Church suggests Mary Magdalene initiated this now-popular saying when she announced Jesus’ miraculous resurrection to Emperor Tiberius in Rome, saying, “Christ is risen.”
Stories are told, though not confirmed, of an egg that turned red in Mary’s hands as she addressed the Emperor, which so impressed him, he had Pilate removed.
Whether or not a red egg factored into Mary’s announcement of “Christ is risen,” it was compelled by the witnessed (and since recorded) fact that Jesus was buried, rose, and appeared again before ascending into heaven.
All four Gospel accounts record the true story of Jesus’ followers discovering that he was risen, indeed. And although the narrative may not read word-for-word as a call-and-response greeting, two sections of Scripture in the New Revised Standard version point to its likely inspiration:
He is not here; for he has been raised, as he said. Come, see the place where he lay. Then go quickly and tell his disciples, ‘He has been raised from the dead, and indeed he is going ahead of you to Galilee; there you will see him.’ This is my message for you. – Matthew 28:6-7
They were saying, “The Lord has risen indeed, and he has appeared to Simon!” – Luke 24:34
Why Christians Say ‘He Is Risen Indeed’
I believe Christians (no matter their timing, festivals, or denomination), express ‘joy of the Lord’ by sharing this beautiful phrase. It’s often shared in the Paschal season, or Easter, because this is a time set aside to remember that Jesus is truth, he offers life, and he is the way.
His prophesied arrival to call us to eternal life confirmed that God is with us, and death cannot keep us from him. Beyond whatever religious or pagan traditions we may enjoy, there was a stone rolled away and a Savior rose.
It’s worth mentioning that the word “indeed” originates from the the Middle English term “in dede” which means, “in truth, or in fact.”
Saying “indeed” either underscores that something is true, or it is used to segue into your next statement—that’s even more worth emphasizing. This is why when we recall that he is risen, we want to follow it with a resounding, “truth!” or “can’t top that!”
Best of all, Christianity.com explains that not only is Jesus risen, but by his resurrection, he raises us. Scripture is clear:
For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. – Romans 6:23
Because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. – Romans 10:9
Jesus didn’t only rise to show us. He rose to save us.
A Prayer to Celebrate That Jesus Is Risen Indeed
Dear Jesus,
Thank you for showing us what is true. Thank you for being our bridge, our Savior, and the way to eternal life in a world you will renew. This Easter, and all year, will you keep the flame of my joy for you burning? Will you remind me when things look bleak that you raise what may seem dead? Help me to not just hear that you are risen, but let me believe it in my bones, that because you are risen, indeed, we have a hope and a future worth celebrating.
Amen.
Sources: Gotquestions.org Wikipedia.org
Wikipedia.org Orthodoxwiki.org Vocabulary.com
Photo Credit: © Getty Images/Boonyachoat
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Video Source: KeithandKristyn Getty
Lia Martin loves to inspire others to lean into the Lord daily. She’s a writer, editor, marketer, former Crosswalk.com Faith Editor, and author of Wisdom at Wit’s End: Abandoning Supermom Myths in Search of Supernatural Peace. When she’s not cultivating words, she loves walking in nature, reading, exploring the latest health trends, and laughing with her two wonderful kids. She blogs at liamartinwriting.com. […]